A gorgeously crafted and achingly honest portrayal of grief will leave you urgent to reach across any distance to reconnect with the people you love.
Synopsis
You go through life thinking there’s so much you need…
Until you leave with only your phone, your wallet, and a picture of your mother.
Marin hasn’t spoken to anyone from her old life since the day she left everything behind. No one knows the truth about those final weeks. Not even her best friend, Mabel. But even thousands of miles away from the California coast, at college in New York, Marin still feels the pull of the life and tragedy she’s tried to outrun. Now, months later, alone in an emptied dorm for winter break, Marin waits. Mabel is coming to visit, and Marin will be forced to face everything that’s been left unsaid and finally confront the loneliness that has made a home in her heart.
My Rating ****
Review
After seeing this book cover on Penguin teen’s Instagram, I just had to read it. I know most readers don’t judge a book by its cover but I couldn’t help myself when I saw such a beautiful design. However, I was not prepared for the emotional turmoil I felt whilst reading this book. Nina Lacour certainly has a superpower when writing such poetic prose.
This book deals with loneliness, sadness, and an overwhelming feeling of grief. The story makes you feel very deeply and makes you think about people who have lost a loved one and if they are truly okay, just as the title suggests.
We Are Okay follows the story of Marin. After the death of her grandfather, Marin quietly slips away from the life she used to live in California and into her new life at college. When her college friends leave for winter break and she is the only person left on campus, Marin is visited by her old friend Mabel, which forces both of them to face the mess Marin ran away from.
This novel beautifully explores the impact of grief on people and their relationships. This is achieved through the two main narratives: the story of Marin and Mabel and the story of Marin and her grandfather. Both of these narratives are told through a first-person perspective. Lacour uses gorgeous and detailed imagery that adds intimate elements to the story as we unpeel the layers of Marin’s denial and grief about her hidden life. At first it isn’t clear what is wrong but these flashbacks to conversations with her Grandpa, we can only assume the worst. There are too many moments between them that are filled with unanswered questions and undiscovered areas within her own home that make Marin question if her grandpa is really okay.
Although there isn’t a lot that actively happens in the book, the core of the story lives with the tension that can be found between the main protagonists. Marin has ignored Mabel since the beginning of freshman year but when she visits her for winter break we can tell there is unsaid history between them. Marin and Mabel spend most of the story eating or sleeping to avoid any real conversation, but Marin’s inner narration voices the anxieties she. This internal dialogues allows the reader to further understand the themes of the novel.
Despite the fact that Lacour strongly focuses on the grieving process, it is not as depressing as it seems. That isn’t to say I didn’t tear up – I definitely did that at least twice. Mabel’s character brings a sense of hope and optimism to the story as her presence draws Marin back to the real world. Mabel’s character continuously pulls Marin to confront the truth, death and lies of her past with the idea that talking to somebody about these issues will help. It’s important that Mabel does not push Marin into anything, instead her presence simply helps Marin trust again, to open up and to share her feelings until she finally believes that she will be okay someday. Lacour teaches her readers an important life lesson about grief as she does not offer quick fixes, instead she does offer a flicker of hope in the recovery process.
We Are Okay succeeds in its portrayal of grief as the main theme whilst LGBT representation appears secondary. This is one of a few novels that I have read that places lesbian identity in the background, as Marin is simply shown to exist whilst dealing with everyday struggles. Lacour never directly labels Marin as gay or Mabel as bisexual, but she makes it clear through their dialogue and flashbacks that there is a past romantic relationship between them. Another author who achieves this is Amber Smith with the portrayal of Brooke in The Last To Let Go.
We Are Okay has been praised by YA readers and authors since its release in 2017. There are many reasons for this, including the absolutely beautiful prose, the slow burn storytelling and for its realistic representation of grief. If you are looking for an emotionally engaging story, or an excuse to shed a tear of two, look no further than We Are Okay.
Favourite Quotes
“The trouble with denial is that when the truth comes, you aren’t ready.”
“I wonder if there’s a secret current that connects people who have lost something. Not in the way that everyone loses something, but in the way that undoes your life, undoes your self, so that when you look at your face it isn’t yours anymore.”
“I was okay just a moment ago. I will learn how to be okay again.”
“I thought that it was more likely the opposite. I must have shut grief out. Found it in books. Cried over fiction instead of the truth. The truth was unconfined, unadorned. There was no poetic language to it, no yellow butterflies, no epic floods. There wasn't a town trapped underwater or generations of men with the same name destined to make the same mistakes. The truth was vast enough to drown in.”
Reviews and Further Praise
“Nina LaCour treats her emotions so beautifully and with such empathy.” —Bustle
“LaCour paints a captivating depiction of loss, bewilderment, and emotional paralysis . . . raw and beautiful.” —Booklist
“Beautifully crafted . . . . A quietly moving, potent novel.” —SLJ
“A moving portrait of a girl struggling to rebound after everything she’s known has been thrown into disarray.” —Publishers Weekly
“So lonely and beautiful that I could hardly breathe. This is a perfect book.” —Stephanie Perkins, bestselling author of Anna and the French Kiss
“As beautiful as the best memories, as sad as the best songs, as hopeful as your best dreams.” —Siobhan Vivian, bestselling author of The Last Boy and Girl in the World
“You can feel every peak and valley of Marin’s emotional journey on your skin, in your gut. Beautifully written, heartfelt, and deeply real.” —Adi Alsaid, author of Never Always Sometimes and Let’s Get Lost
About the author
Nina LaCour grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area. Her first job was at fourteen in an independent bookstore, and she has since worked in two others. She has tutored and taught in various places, from a juvenile hall to a private college. She now teaches English at an independent high school.
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